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Friday, April 14, 2017

Trying to Be an Adult Today

I'm a little frazzled. My son plays football and the coach is leaving. The kid is taking it better than I am, but still it's got to hurt. You get close to people, you look up to them and then poof! They go off to another team. It seems he was always building up the guys and making them feel great about their team and then suddenly gone. I can't say I'm not disappointed. I think there is something to say about commitment that I can't really express right here. I don't want to put my son in any kind of a bad way with the team by expressing my opinions so I won't. He will have to learn from ti I guess.

So what else? Not much. I am in a funk today because of everything going on and I don't want to leave the house. I can't take a shower. I have no clean clothes. LOL That is a long story. My middle kid decided that he was going to clean the laundry room one day so, instead of putting the clothes into the hamper that were knocked down on the floor (by him), he throws them all away. I'm down to one pair of pants and my plaid pajama pants. Can you believe that? It's just something I deal with. Hopefully he will move soon. He's 22.

All of this stuff going on with my kids and all of my appliances failing and work going slow doesn't help when I'm in perimenpause, either. No, I haven't checked with my doctor. I don't really have one. the only doctors available on my crappy insurance plan (thank obozo) I don't really want to have as my physicians for certain reasons. So, I'm assuming that it is just the beginnings of menopause. It started last year. My cycle usually always starts between the 4th and the 9th then suddenly it started every 3 weeks. Then it was every 2 weeks. Then it got down to 1 week. I was hoping it would dwindle out of existence, but it doesn't. Now it is back to the first week of the month. It's so annoying. I'm 50. It's time now. OK?

So with all of this going on and the hormones off the charts, I'm a wreck. I'm tired. My left shoulder was hurting for awhile, numb. Sometimes in my arm and wrist. I went to the urgent care when it was happening. They did 3 EKGs, but nothing. I was also having ear aches. He gave me antibiotics. Then the pain went away. I haven't made a follow up appointment because I just don't like doctors with 3rd world degrees. Sorry.  So I'm stuck. I think it's a nerve problem with my shoulder when I picked up a rather large screen tv that I got off of freecycle. I don't know. I moved it again the other day and guess what? The pain is back.

So now I'm totally tired and bummed. I think I'll just go take a middle aged nap and let my worries fade away for an hour or two. With my luck, my ex-husband will come over to harass me. ugh. Sorry this isn't upbeat. I'm looking for my positive side, but I think the hormones are hiding it.
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